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Tag Archives: Spirituality and Encouragement

The Cocoon…

Sitting right here in this spot can be soooo frustrating. Just sitting here and watching the beautiful things of life  pass me by. I look around my little cold, dark  brown shell of a home and wonder how I got stuck here in the first place.

Oh God why?? Why did you have to put me here?? Why not there?…I cry out in sheer frustration..

 

Sorry for being so emotional.

Let me introduce myself formally.

I am one who is disliked by everyone who knows me…nah…sees me. I really doubt if anyone knows me. I have no beauty inside nor do I have anything that attracts anyone to me. I never get what I want and can only hope things would get better. From the look of things, they never will.

I turn to God in search of answers as I have no one to ask my questions…and eventually end up in the midst of my tears with the little relief I derive from pouring out the contents of my soul…well, until it fills up again.

Time seems to crawl by. Not like I move any faster anyway.

Seconds seem like hours. Hours, hmmm…feel like years.

Weeks feel like…centuries forever.

Looking at all the beauty and success stories around me bring me down, as much as I rejoice with them. Truly, I do rejoice in me. It’s just that I look up and see the rain clouds of self pity that hang visibly over me every second I breathe.

I look longingly at a butterfly flutter by.

Sigh.

She’s sooo pretty. And graceful too!

If I could be half as beautiful…

No I can’t.

God, if only I could fly.

Fl…?? I chuckle silently. Pigs would definitely do that first.

And there I feel it all coming up again. Bursting into tears, I roll up into my ball of comfort and sob myself to sleep… as always.

#WHAM!!!!#

I could have sworn two planets had collided right over my head… I turn around and peeping through the cracks in my wall, expecting to see what Pluto looked like,  I see the last pieces of the pretty butterfly I envied so much being gobbled up by a strange creature.

“God!!! This is so not fair!!”,  I mumbled as I shook where I lay. Everything seemed so right and perfect with her.

And quietly, I thanked God that I was all curled up when it happened. That could have been me.

Time passes.

More time passes..

Forever seems to pass too..

I got to learn pretty fast that I since I can’t explain how I got here in the first place, I probably can’t explain what the future holds…and day by day, I learn to console myself with these words.

I look on as brightly coloured butterflies fly by each day, and somehow today forgetting my own words of consolation, I cried so hard I shook and fell.

This is my end I said to myself as I fell through the leaves and branches…what more could happen to me than this??

And as I heaved a sigh I assumed to be my last, I felt myself explode into a bundle of colours.

What is happening to…Goodness gracious!!!

I CAN FLY!!

GNT Matthew 6:30It is God who clothes the wild grass – grass that is here today and gone tomorrow, burned up in the oven. Won’t he be all the more sure to clothe you? What little faith you have!!!

I have been there, and I know I would have to read this out to myself someday. But to you, head hung low in depression thinking you would never achieve your dreams, thinking the worst that could happen has happened, and you’re tossed through the storms of life, take a look around at the very things around you…and I hope you would see hope in every storm, and strength in every trial.

I have lost friends and people that had way more than I have now. I have life.

This is dedicated to God, for keeping me through till now, and to everybody who would read it.

Larva

I look closely at a yellow dotted leaf as I flutter past a tree with Nadia by my side, and silently pray for patience and understanding from God for our little ones as they go through that stage in life…

And yeah…that they get to have her my pretty colours too!!!

#wink#

Nadia

©Bomboy 2013

 
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Posted by on December 2, 2014 in Spirituality and Encouragement

 

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Storms of life…

Storms of life…

Storms of life…

13 October 2013

03:46 AM

Ok. So I got woken up at 3:00am on Sunday morning by a friend. A friend who was in need of help. Honestly, if not for the pee that woke me up a few minutes earlier, I might not have picked the call just so I could complete my 8 hours weekend sleep. And yes, I slept in the afternoon too.

Woke up to a call of someone who was at a point I could only imagine. At a traffic light with all the lights blinking at the same time.

 

Confused…

Depressed..

Hopeless.

Through the tears that rocked through her voice, she explained she had done all possible things every Christian should have done, and honestly, I could to an extent, agree with her.

We take too many things for granted…God have mercy on us.

People hurt deep inside.

Through the smiles and cheer on Sundays, lies a cloudy, turbulent storm in hearts.

As Christians, are we building ourselves in unity or we’ve joined the mad rush for drama and attention in the church? What are our priorities? I could only pray for the Holy Spirit to minister to her at that point of need…a point only visible between herself and God.

In the midst of storms, what do we do?

Where do we go when we have no place to go?

Who do we talk to in the silence of our hearts?

Who do we lean on when the pillars of our lives rock with our sobs and the weight of our burdens?

Searching through the Bible, I stumbled upon a passage that answered every question.

Rom 8:38 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,

Rom 8:39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

God owns the maps of our lives. We never know where we are going without a map of some sort. He alone can console us in times of depression and sorrow.

He sees where we are coming from…

He knows where we are going to..

He sees what’s going on with us now.

Let’s take off the masks of religion from our faces…the dance steps, the luxury, the attention, the “holy attitudes”, and minister to lives of people God puts in our paths.

If it’s the only thing we can do as Christians, let’s do it and do it well.

I never got the chance to complete the sleep anyway because I felt there were moooore people in the world that couldn’t sleep because of different reasons, and I was simply selfish in my gluttony for sleep.

Personally that night, I learnt to love all the people in my life…and I learnt to trust God for my own life.

Let’s make a change in our darkening world. Trust me, it might not get any brighter than it is now.

I’m not perfect, but I’m trusting God every day for His guidance and mercy.

Remember, smiles do not reflect happiness and fullness of joy…look deeper into those eyes again and let God speak to you.

Remain blessed.

NB: A friend also pulled me out of a situation similar to that just two days ago. A friend I had met only once in my life. He made me realize there were more people in this world that needed more from us though we didn’t have enough ourselves. And between both of us, I’d say he gave me the strength to encourage another soul tonight.

Bomboy © Copyright 2013

 
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Posted by on October 13, 2013 in Spirituality and Encouragement

 

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The Lover…

The Lover…

I love you.

I love you so much it hurts.

I find so much joy with you by my side.

I’m willing to go any length just because of you.

I feel so much pride knowing you’re mine…telling all who care to know how much I gave up just to have you with me…

Call me a jealous lover…cause I know I am.

 

I watch you sleep every night

Looking at you with longing eyes

Hoping you’d turn and see the love in my eyes

Hoping you’d tell me about your day

What you did…didn’t do…shulda done

Who said what…where you went…what you saw

What you ate…who your friends are…what you plan to do

What made you smile…what made you laugh

What made you sad…what made you cry.

But all I get, like other nights gone by

Is another cold, heart-wrenching hush as I talk to you

And this, like other nights, is what I go through.

 

I watch you wake up

Hoping you’d tell me about your night

Hoping you’d thank me for staying up all night

Hoping you’d tell me how you love the morning sun

But you hurriedly take glances at the clock

And once again, as you run out, I feel the shock

 

Everything you have is mine

Everything you seek, I can give

Everything you say, I hear

Everything you don’t say, I know

Everything that happens to and around you, I know

Why do you keep on running away from me?

Why don’t you talk to me?

You don’t even want to hear my name!

Why are you so ashamed to call me your love in return?

What have I not done to make you comfortable and happy?

I went much farther than the ones that claim to give you what I have given you already…

Through the hurt, through the shame…

I had you in mind as my bride…the real reason why I came

Every single time you get hurt and come running back, have I for once pushed you away?

And yet, as soon as you get a little more strength, you go right to the same one that caused you so much pain…

Only to repeat the cycle again.

I look on helplessly with love and jealousy in my heart

As you seem so happy in your walk through the minefield

My heart torn apart in bits as it beats faster with every step you take

Hoping you’d hear my voice and come back to me

 

I paid so much to have you

So much…so much you can’t imagine

I do so much to keep you from harm

I put all things that please you in place

Just to see that smile light up your face

I keep all things dear to your heart close to mine

Al because I want to see that glow on your face every day…just like the sunshine

I could have let you go on that day, but the scales were just not in balance

I couldn’t trade you for anything…not even the authority I was to give up.

 

 

All I want is to know you love me

To hear you talk to me and tell me all you care about

I’m never tired of hearing you speak

A little whisper of thanks

Hear you chat excitedly about me to your friends

To feel you heartbeat quicken as you think of me

To spend a moment to think of me

I am the one who can give you all things in perfection

Love, peace, happiness and affection

A perfect picture of your future

Our future

Is this too much to ask my love?

Bomboy © Copyright 2012

 

 

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The Signboard…

The Signboard…

I stand in everyone’s midst
All gaze at me as they pass by.
Some stop to resolve their doubts with me.
Leaving happily, glad they know now where to go

I stand here through the day, the sun, the rain, the night
Helping people all around me find their way home.
I am important, I am vital, and they need me…
They can’t do without me, I believe.
I am a compass, indispensable through the stormy night.
I am a sign, bright and colourful, bringing smiles to the faces of lost and weary travelers

But they leave me where I stand.
Their joyful cheers and laughter go with them
The silence is surreal
And emptiness surrounds me like a cloak.

I have come to realize that where I stand is my home.
And all I had in me has been taken
With nothing given in return.
Except for the distant reflection of their brake lights,
Dimming as they happily head home

Day after day,I stand where I stand.
Helping others get to their destination.
Until Authority decides I no longer guide them home..
As they which journey
Have arrived.

And I, I am just a Signboard.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Bible says,”Let he who thinks he stands take heed, lest he fall”

Dedicated to the Owner of my Soul, Ajifowowe Bolatito, Feyi FeyVored Fagade, to you out there who’s ready to come in from the cold…and yeah..to humble me.
🙂

Bomboy © Copyright 2012

 
 

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THIS KIND GOD…I NEVER SEE YOUR TYPE!!!

THIS KIND GOD…I NEVER SEE YOUR TYPE!!!

Sometimes, I wonder why I’m still living…and others like me too. We come to this world with the aim of achieving everything apart from the main reason we came here; that’s as bad as going to a fruit garden with an empty belly in search for food, and eventually spend the day chasing and catching butterflies!! The worst thing or crime that can be committed in the aviation industry is when a pilot depends solely on his vision, ignoring the presence of the radar. At such high speeds and perhaps zero visibility, the radar directs the pilot to perform touch downs. Without a radar, a pilot will not fly willingly. We as humans have no idea about the future, or what tomorrow brings, and still neglect our ONLY radar of life, the only person who can safely guide us through all the turbulence of life’s flight, bringing us safely to our destination. We prefer to strain our eyes and ears and wear ourselves out thinking about how to go through the next rain cloud without flying into a mountain while our radar blinks ceaselessly depicting the devastating presence of a mountain right ahead!! We forget that the very reasons we work to kill ourselves are temporary…just a tiny fraction of our time ahead, and most of the things we fight so hard for like land, women, pride, houses, cars might outlive us{ i.e. would still exist when we are dead, think of it, the land we fight to own and build or farm was fought for about a hundred years ago too!!} we forget His promise to us about every other thing we want given to us after we have sought his Kingdom! We forget the fact that He owns everything we desert Him to chase. We forget He is the same one that turned water into wine and everything would be made beautiful in His own time!!! He does care about what we go through on a daily basis and all the things that make us sad, and he wants us to know that he can see far beyond our noses, and that brighter things lie ahead of us…but stupidly, we ignore his comfort due to what we see just “in front of our noses”. He looks on at us wondering what else needs to be explained to us because it’s just logical that we stick closer than glue to him as he is our ultimate hope of survival…beautiful enough, he looks on wondering but with understanding and loads of mercy. Even human beings can never be as merciful and understanding as he is. He knows what he bargained for when he came down to die for us…he knew each and every solitary weakness we have in us and still did it for us.

I read somewhere that human beings lose their health to make money, and  then lose their money to restore their health!! In all our clumsiness, the good news is he understands. Above all when we fall down, we simply must rise to the fact that we have done wrong and ask for forgiveness…then forgive ourselves. We tend to think that the gravity of our shortcomings are way too much and perhaps too frequent, but yet we forget that he, unlike us, would forgive us and hold us without even remembering whatever it is we have done. It’s a mystery I still can’t get to understand…

 
 

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